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[soul music] ♪ - ♪ i'm gonna do my one line here ♪ - oh, yeah. from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome to "the daily "y
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show." my name is jon stewart. we've got a good show for you tonight. our show is aamazing. we have an incredible documentarian jehane noujaim is on the show. she's done this amazing documentary about the freedom and democracy movements in egypt. it's incredible. you have to check it out. but before we go into freedom and democracy obviously there's another question plaguing this country. corporations: are they people? >> corporations are people, my friend. >> jon: thank you for that you dapper stranger. [laughter] if only there was some way to prove that corporations were not people. show their inability to love. to show that they lack awareness of their own mortality. to see what they do when you walk in on them masturbating. [ laughter ] are they embarrassed? or like our nonhuman ape cousins do they just keep plugging away?
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[laughter] while eerily maintaining eye contact. seriously dude i was just on my way to the reptile house. they are oddly human, i have to say. one way to distinguish corporations from people would be to show that they don't suffer the same consequences for their actions that we mere mortals may. for instance,, let's say you or i knowingly sold say 700,000 bad mortgages. [ laughter ] let's say we knew it but we still dumped that (bleep) on others. what would happen to us? probably not this. >> bank of america says it will pay $404 million. >> settling claims related to a decades worth of bad mortgage loans it sold to freddie mac. >> jon: i'm sorry i committed
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systemic fraud for ten years. how about i give you a cut of it? in corporate america there's a way to cover up any wrong doing. >> that's what the money is for. >> jon: it's that old saying don't do the crime if you can't pay the nominal fine. >> ubs will settle charges it mislead investors. >> they've settled a case for $550 million. it's the largest settlement between the federal government and corporation. the justice department and jp morgan chase are expected to sign a $13 billion deal. >> jon: i know what you are thinking $13 billion that's like make john carter 52 times. [ laughter ] how is jp morgan going to come up with that kind of scratch. >> they earned over $20 billion last year so the $13 billion is affordable for them.
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[laughter] >> jon: was that dude staring at you guys, too? [laughter] all right. so let me see if i get. this let me do the math. it's costing them 52 john carters but they earned enough to make 80 john carters. money was so much easier top comprehend before we moved to a job carter based financial system. [laughter] here is another marker that distinguishes people from corporations. >> under the terms of the settlement ubs did not admit any wrongdoing. >> goldman admitted no wrongdoing in the process. >> jp morgan will not admit wrongdoing per se. >> jon: so if you didn't do anything wrong per se is the $13 billion a gift? a down payment, a tip, i didn't do anything wrong but you are a hell of a government there here is a little something. hey, hey, nice fraud case.
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now go home and get your (bleep). [ laughter ] just in case you think it only works for financial corporations it doesn't. >> health care manufacturer johnson & johnson will pay more than $2 billion to settle civil and criminal allegations. >> jon: i expect this from you jobson but not you johnson. [ laughter ] actually to be honest with you, i've not trusted johnson and jon since i tried to stop my child's crying but poring a bottle of their patented no more tears shampoo in his eye. did not work at all. there were still tears after i poured it in there. in fact, this may have exacerbated the situation. [laughter] what complex corporation scheme did they pull that allows them to escape full prosecution? >> they bribed doctors and
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pharmacies. they got them to prescribe drugs parly to the elderly, children and the decision abled despite health risks or a lack of scientific evidence showing any health benefits for patients. >> jon: holy (bleep). they knowingly bribed doctors to give useless drugs to old people, the disabled, and babies. you are not even allowed to do that in grand theft auto. [ laughter ] you know, i have a question. the question is: >> is anybody going to jail? >> jon: that was the question. we have more prisoners than any other country in the world. not even per capita, just more. so will any of the people who make up these corporations be joining them? >> some economists say bank
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executives should be in handcuffs. >> why isn't somebody going to jail? >> all i can say it's in the hands of federal prosecutors. >> is it possible somebody could go to jail. >> yes. >> jon: it's possible. it's also possible i'm resign tomorrow to pursue my real passion rhythmic gym mass ticks. am i going to? no. corporations can commit fraud, money laundering, bribe enabled placebo baby drugging and merely pay back a portion of the ill gotten gains as the price of doing business. how do people fair? >> three students put in handcuffs because they would not leave their school bus stop. >> we were just waiting for the bus and they start arresting us. 7 rjrj,x,x èv$,x
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applause]d >> jon: welcome back. as we learned in the last segment, no one who commits these fraudulent financial deals and corporation things goes to jail when they doll something illegal. did you know that they also do not go to jail for doing things that should be illegal but for some reason are not at all illegal. it's true. case in point. a few weeks ago bloomberg news broke an unbelievable story. it's a tale of two companies first blackstone that sounds like it should be an evil wizards castle but actually a private equity firm. so same deal. the second company codere that runs betting particle yoornz race tracks all over europe. classy. early this year blackstone bought something called a credit default swap on debt that codere owed to a third party which
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means blackstone would make money if codere blew a loan payment to the other guys. then a short time later blackstone offered codere a $100 million with the condition that they pay the other loan to the other company late. the loan blackstone had already bet they owe would pay late. blackstone backs them and they pay late. the credit default is trigger and blackstone collects $15 million in insurance money. i'm sure you are asking yourself i'm sure they saw something like that in goodfellas when they get insurance on a restaurant and deliberately blow the restaurant up. in goodfellas it's illegal. in the financial world it's above board. for more we turn to senior correspondent samantha bee. sam, this is insane. so when a deal like this goes
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down. how much coverage has this incredibly ereegous -- egreg greigous behavior gotten on the 24 hour news networks? >> zero. >> jon: nothing? >> wait there was um, nothing. >> jon: really? 600 television channels three 24 hour news networks. >> and no stories but it's (bleep) crazy. they are not going to get away with it. what blackstone did was clearly a huge story but the business networks eager young reporters have better things to explain. i went to the "new york times" the paper of record to find out why all those tv (bleep) wouldn't cover it. this say complex story and it takes a lot to unpack it. there's sort of a rule that you can't describe it in ten seconds it's not something they want to cover. >> i take it as a challenge and -- >> can i just lay out the facts.
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>> go. >> blackstone loaned money to a spanish gambling parlor company. they bought insurance. >> time is up. that was terrible let me try. rich (bleep) want all the money for themselves. i have seven seconds left. baba booey. baba boy. done. likely they were willing to blow the whistle. this is a huge story how does the "new york times" cover it? >> "new york times" didn't cover. why, why didn't you cover the store? >> we're busier than one armed paper hangers covering the miscreance that we oid die phi. this is another day on wall
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street. >> a front page story would be hedge fund with evil sounding name didn't do anything today. >> i'm drowning in material. >> would you cover it if we snuck it into a gay wedding announcement. >> not my department. >> i guess they are too busy running stories on poop facials. if tv and papers didn't have it maybe the web would. somebody tell chris brown to punch blackstone or i'll go to the pros. pinch me to the ideas. i need them to be twerk and mostly i need them to be -- you go. >> i feel like any time we get the chance to use a crazy nicholas cage photo in a post. >> i love that already. >> what they did was like the plot of saw. >> i like it it's dark. >> like disney princesses explain the blackis stone
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storey. >> full of great ideas. how about the blackstone credit default zeal just like ross and rachel from friends. >> oh, my god i thought i was talking to young people. why not do a post about joanie and cachie. they weren't getting it. when i needed was a local newsman, catastrophic weather and this story would be every where. i hope you can hear me over the storm. blackstone loaned a $100 million to a struggling spanish company codere. what it makes it interesting is that they wanted codere to default thmple is ridiculous. >> you are selling it. get back here. you know you want this. >> all right time to go viral. commencing youtube def-con1. get in here and do something
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adorable now. go. okay the kittens are not listening to me. i had tried almost everything. hey, how do you lose page views? there's nothing better than kittens. ♪ i came in wrecking ball >> except for this. i knew what i had to do [. ♪ blackstone loaned money to this other company called codere and got them to purposely miss a debt payment triggering a credit event so blackstone could cash in on a credit default loan they made betting they would default. blackstone netted $15 million ouch. and it was totally legal and these are the kind of shady deals that got us into the recession into the first place. are you listening now? is this what you wanted? drink it in (bleep). [ laughter ]
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>> jon: samantha bee. bee.
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[cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight a documentary filmmaker. her latest film on the short list for an academy award nomination is called "the square."
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[sirens] >> jon: intense. please welcome jehane noujaim. [cheers and applause] nice to see you. [cheers and applause] first of all, congratulations. it is the footage, the stories are incredible -- >> thank you. >> jon: they are gripping. the idea as you even saw just in that clip, rifles being pointed. >> it was intense.
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>> jon: and you are filming. >> a number of us. i mean the whole crew met in the square. there were a number of people filming. >> jon: how did this come about? >> i went down as a protester just like everybody else did, met my entire crew in the square, met the characters in the square. with we were all sleeping next to each other in tents. >> jon: this is the original uprising against mubarak, not the most recent one? >> this is starting in january 2011. i landed in egypt gotten arrested 20 minutes after landing at the airport because they found an old dvd of a previous film i had mealed called "egypt we're watching you." not the best film to be found by military intelligence as the country is excluding. >> jon: do you travel with your entire uovre with you, all your films in the bag? >> in this case i was handing out dvds for people in the movie. that's why it was in the bag.
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they let me go after eight hours. after i tried to get rid of dvd they found the bits in the drain. they held up the shard of glass as evidence. i confessed all and they finally let me go. i went to the square. it was magical, men, women, all different classes basically fighting for a different country. >> jon: it was amazing to see in the early days, too, muslim brotherhood and secularists and, you know, so called liberals, so called conservatives, people of all different political persuasions really forming a very common bond and ethos. >> that's right. it never happened before. we grew up in an egypt where, you know, under emergency law you can't have more than four or five people meeting and talking about politics. this was unheard of. it was an incredible feeling. >> jon: it was for 30 years people lived under this regime under mubarak. >> exactly, yeah. >> jon: you make the film. it goes to sundance and is an
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enormous hit. this was when? >> that was january of this year. yeah. 2013. >> jon: so your film is a hit. >> won the aawed audience award. the people spoke. >> jon: the people spoke and you realize they are going to have another revolution there. what do you do? >> we went back. this happened as we were on our way to sundance. all of our characters were in the streets saying morsi is using the tools of democracy to create another dictatorship and we couldn't end the story there because it was continuing. as it continues today. people are still fighting. people have just been thrown in jail again. we basically go back, continue filming, reedit the film and open it in toronto. >> jon: the crazy thing now is -- so the people that have come together, now the divisions begin to cleave again. you watch that go down and it's
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heartbreaking. >> it is. well you have to see the film but -- >> jon: we don't have to. we live in a democracy. [laughter] but i would say this: you should choose to. [ laughter ] it's quite amazing. continue. >> you -- in order to know the ending of the film, you have to see the film, but in general without spoiling the ending it's a ps active look because it looks at the friendships that stayed together despite the political divide. we cover from all these different angles, the stories behind the headlines of what it meant to feel and be in the middle of revolution. you know, in the news you see the head kleinlines. you see million man march or the bloodiest battle, but you never see the mouth or the gandy when they've lost everything and everybody has left them and they feel alone and lonely. that's what you watch. you watch how change happens. >> jon: how greatness emerges from this chaos. i mean people really doll fill the moment with courage, with
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inspiration. it's amazing to watch ordinary people take on that mantle. >> thawrch. we've had some incredible heroes pop up during this revolution. one of them who you supported. >> jon: love it. yes. i support them from here. really it's quite luxurious. >> right now it's horrible because we've been showing the film everywhere and it's getting such accolades. i just talked to ahmed who is the main character in the film and said i'm so sorry because i can't show it in egypt yet. we're waiting for permission to release it in egypt. >> jon: can you stick around? >> can i. >> jon: we'll talk about ahmed and what is happening in egypt right new and why you are having trouble showing it there. the square is available on netflix and in select cities on january 17. it's remarkable. jehane noujaim. thank you.
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[cheers and applause]
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The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
Comedy Central December 4, 2013 11:00pm-11:31pm PST

Jehane Noujaim; News/Business. Jehane Noujaim. (2013) Director Jehane Noujaim. New. (CC)

TOPIC FREQUENCY Blackstone 15, Egypt 5, Us 4, Johnson 2, America 2, Ahmed 2, John Carters 2, Jon Stewart 2, Jehane Noujaim 2, Handcuffs 2, Jon 1, Sam 1, Goldman 1, John Carter 1, Samantha 1, Chris Brown 1, Jobson 1, Gandy 1, Cachie 1, Nicholas Cage 1
Network Comedy Central
Duration 00:31:00
Rating TV-G
Scanned in San Francisco, CA, USA
Source Comcast Cable
Tuner Channel v63
Video Codec mpeg2video
Audio Cocec ac3
Pixel width 528
Pixel height 480
Sponsor Internet Archive
Audio/Visual sound, color

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on 12/5/2013